NOAH

My main question coming into this film was how would the director and co-screenwriter Darren Aronofsky turn the relatively straightforward story we all know into something that would be entertaining for a full 138 minutes.

The answer inevitably is to take some liberties with the story by injecting several unexpected elements. 

One of these is the existence of Watchers, stone giants who are fallen angels, punished by God for trying to help Adam and Eve.  Apparently there is some basis for these in the Book of Enoch (I do the research so you don't have to).  They come around to the idea of helping Noah (Russell Crowe) after some initial hostility (being turned from angels to the equivalent of The Thing has made them somewhat grumpy).

Other liberties have less basis.  

In the Bible each of Noah's three sons has a wife, which is handy for repopulating the world après le deluge.

In this version the future of the human race looks a bit iffy.  We can assume that Noah's wife Naameh (Jennifer Connelly) is past childbearing age, and of the three sons only the good-looking but bland Shem has a wife, Ila (Emma Watson), but due to a childhood injury she can't have children.  

Of the other two sons Ham is decidedly frustrated at the thought of all his potential mates getting drowned, which creates friction between him and Noah, whilst the third son Japheth is too young to care about future wives.

There are two other important characters (both mentioned in the Bible).

Firstly, Anthony Hopkins has fun as a rather gaga grandfather of Noah, Methuselah, who has some magical powers it seems.  Naameh persuades him to use those powers to make Ila fertile.  She does this behind Noah's back because he has got it into his head that God wants the human race to die out rather than continue.

Also having fun is Ray Winstone, as Tubal-cain, the ruler of everyone it seems but Noah and his family.  

In a thrilling sequence, when the Flood eventually arrives Noah and the Watchers battle to stop Tubal-cain's people from entering the Ark.  Unfortunately a young woman who Ham has met and fallen for is drowned in a way which Ham somewhat unreasonably blames Noah for.  Even more unfortunately, Tubal-cain manages to board the Ark without anyone knowing but Ham. 

So life on board the Ark, which otherwise might have been very dull, is enlivened by two dramas.

Firstly, Tubal-cain plays on Ham's grievances to try to persuade him to help in killing Noah.

Secondly, Ila gets pregnant.  This leads Noah to threaten to kill her baby unless it turns out to be a son.  Noah's logic seems to be that a grandson would never commit incest with Ila, so can be allowed to live, whereas a granddaughter might well have children fathered by either of her uncles, so must die.

These two dramas reach simultaneous and exciting climaxes when Tubal-cain makes his move against Noah, and Ila gives birth to twin daughters.  Thankfully both Ham and Noah come to their senses and do the right thing.

That's pretty much it: the Ark hits land and Ham decides to go off wandering on his own. That leaves Japheth with the job of repopulating the world with the help of his two nieces.

On the acting front the perfectly cast Crowe carries the film effortlessly, aided by the excellent Connelly.  She doesn't get much to do until we're on board the Ark, but then she is able to remind us of her talent and to make me think she should have more great movies in her résumé than she does.

Whilst I wouldn't go so far as to say that this is a great film I thoroughly enjoyed it after a somewhat sticky opening half-hour.   Crucially the special effects are of the same high standard as the direction and acting.  

The environmental messaging that crops up from time to time, and the provocative idea that maybe it would have been a good thing had humanity not survived, only added to the fun as far as I was concerned. 

RATING: ✓ If You've Nothing Better To Do